Saturday, November 14, 2009
my last time....

hm....exams are over....
there is a lot of time
ya lots of time for miie to think a lot
be emo
hm...having exam is not a bad thing because it will only make miie busy all the time...
everyday EAT SLEEP, STUDY.....
when there is no more exam...
must be a emo time for miie ba.....
hm....ya...this is not a bad thing again....
because you won't be lost in my memory...my mind...
hm....just to add in...
hm....my study place will be the user place like...Khatib mac and Yishun Drive Thru Mac.....
at khatib mac....i was always occupie with friends....
but in Drive Thru Mac.....i choose to be alone
hm.....because i use to spend time there with....
although its just 1 day...
but its the day when i am really very happy....
hm...i remember that day i was studying for my O level....
SHE came....
ya although the purpose for her to go there is just to meet her friend...
but this is the time when i feel that we are so close....
was very excited during the time....
but of course
i didn't show it out....
haha maybe thats miie...
i don't like to say things straight...
i like to twist and turn.....
thats why i always offended lots of people
hm....especially you.....
after studying at drive thru mac....
i use to walk to the yishun bus interchange by passing by chong pang....
but i just found a new route....
i name it 'The Route of My Memories'
hm.....whatever things i do there is a reason behind it.....
lets refresh back to my study life ba.....
During my study period, i always go home at 10.45pm...
not too early....nor too late....
ya 10.45pm....this is around the time when she has end her work and reach yishun....
(at least i have the choice to wait for her to end her work and reach home safely....)
not too early, because i might meet her....
as i am afraid to meet her....
because i don't know how to face her...
and this may not be the time for us to meet....
although i really want to meet her....
but the feelings will be totally different.....
so just let both of us to have some peace....
neither of us will bother anyone...
hm....but on 10/11....
that will be my last day walking that route....
because my O level end le....
so maybe there is a very low chance that i will be going there again....
i will missed the place....
that route...
that time....when i hold your hand automatically while crossing the road...
it is really very close....
the car is like so close to us....
hm....lucky that you are ok....
and im such a stupid.
because everytime when i cross THAT road, my hand will automatically raised up to the height of my hips.....
but after that, i then realised that there is no one beside miie....
hm....ya i am a stupid person.....like to do all sorts of stupid things.....
shall i run away from the truth?
hm...maybe will still do so ba...
by working all day...
MAKE MYSELF EXHAUSTED.....
THEN DON'T HAVE TO THING ANYTHING LE....
haha.....
there is other thing i will like to add in....
during mooncake festival, i did say the mooncake is very 'KU'
hm...because i celebrate the day on my own.....
i did go around to find where are you....
i even bought the sparkles...
just in case it is needed.....
honestly, we did pass by each other....
because on that day, i pass by the kinder garden at blk 746...
i didn't notice you are at the park....
i just walk like that....
this really proven something to miie....
we are not proven to be together.....
honestly, I STILL LOVE YOU....
but sometimes there is something which is beyond my control.....
i am really speechless....
didn't know how to react that time....
but nevermind....
i hope that you will xinfu.....
LZ I LOVE YOU....
and eveyone should try to listen to the song sang by Brian McKnight
'Back At One'
BYE

-END-

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Time: 12:38 AM


no title....
maybe will be posting a long post later...
hm...so readers
sorry arh.....
it will be boring again....
but it have been stored in miie for very long
ever since O level start...
so sorry readers
if that doesn't meets your expectation of a blog post...
-end here-

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Time: 12:04 AM

Wednesday, October 7, 2009
Going crazy soon....

hi im back again...
hm....yes im going crazy soon....
its hard to pretend someone that you are not...
its hard to put up a smile when you are sad....
forcing myself to be happy
but in the end, i am making myself more sad.....
hmm......ya really don't know whats that.....
really want to ask but i can't....
its totally different from what i use to feel.....
hm....maybe i just think too much ba....
or its the truth as she is trying to give miie a answer indirectly....
really don't want to force anyone....
hm.....im so tired now.....
very tired....
but i have another fear.....
i fear to get on my bed and sleep....
because i don't dare to dream....
hm... didn't really sleep well for few days.....
but even there is time for miie to sleep, i choose not to.....
because do you know how scary it is.....
really don't know what i want now....
honestly i feel so fortunate that, the day before yesterday.
Because although i sleep for very long, but i didn't dream of anything...
thats so lucky of miie....
because i really scared to dream....
i was wondering should i sleep later.....
ya really very tired....
but please, if i really sleep
GOD....don't let miie to dream.....
haiz....its just like having a fade hopes all along......
I can really able to say those three words very seiously because i have really make up my mind le.....
but.......
its no point for miie to say now.....
lets see whether i have the chance again ba....
ya honestly although i say i have already let go.....
but.....*smile*
you are so jiaohwa....
you ran back to my my again...
haha.....really don't want you to suffer thats why
i have lots of words in miie doesn't want to say out.....
ya....maybe towards others im not competeable....
but i can say im another person that fall into your well(trap) very deeply....
if someone is as deeper than miie, haha maybe i will use hand to dig out all the soil that is below miie....
to make it deeper.....haha stupid i know..
someone ask miie..
"Why do you have to do that? Haven't you ever thought of climbing out?"
haha my answer will be.....
haha no point because the answer is easy....
haha 'i don't want to come out'
haha people call miie stupid, haha i just love being stupid....
maybe really got your hint le....
haha.....although i don't want that to be the truth.....
but i have to accept the facts....
nevermind there is lots of ways to love someone....
so i have found my way le.....
although its not the way i want....
but i do not have much choice or i don't have a choice le.....
hm....i can let go of you now....
its hurtful, but i will be strong....
and let all of your all guys to guess something...
theres a riddle for everyone of you....
haha see carefully le....
People say:
Letting go of you,
7 words to add in...
haha readers make a guess ba....
haha because sometimes not everything can say it out de...
so lets guess ba....
enjoy...
-END-

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Time: 11:56 PM

Tuesday, October 6, 2009
I ask too much....

hey im back again.....
hm...maybe its a boring post again readers...
hope that i didn't disappoint you all....
haha....
hm... today was a sleepy day for miie
really disappoint myself a lot today...
instead of going to khatib mac and study..
in the end,
i spent my 3 to 4 hours or time slepping...
haha so didn't really study much english today
haiz....
hm...exam coming my way in 2 weeks time...
got lots to prepare...
so hope that i still can make it...
hm...god bless me again....lolx
another topic(lolx):
hm....sometimes we have to act normally...
really get the picture quite clear now....
hm....i can feel that everything will be over when my O level is over..
so don't think there is a point for miie to stay up till so late le...
the word 'annoyed' is really a powerful word...
i can sense that too...
i can no longer be interesting again...haha....
i think its has really lost it le....
hm....don't know how to make another 1 out.....
hm.....haha really kind of speechless.....
but no matter what,
thats the truth....
you can't do anything
no matter how afraid i am, it will really have to come 1 day...
really a little 不舍得
haha like what i say in my previous post.....
船到桥头自然直。。。
但我觉得我的船已经无法动了。。
船已经沉入水里了。。。
现在再也不会有答案了。。。
因为我已经得到我的答案了。。。。
应该放手了。。
这样我就不会成为你的负担。。
那你也可以活得快乐许多。。。。
因为我喜欢看到你快乐的样子。。。
就让我自己承受这些吧。。。
当成是我的教训或暴饮吧。。。
这句话送给你:
只要笑一笑,这个世界才会更美好。。
如果我的伤痛和痛苦可以换来你的一笑,我觉得好值得喔。。。
.....TvT...
-end-

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Time: 12:55 AM

Monday, October 5, 2009
hm...can't sleep....


hm...hi...
its damn late...or in other words it is very early....
haha still unable to fall asleep....
hm...maybe can say unable to sleep or scared to be asleep..haha....
don't like to dream now because when dream is over, everything will be going back to the normal way....
the truth is still the truth...
i can't run away from it.....
hm....later haveing english blk revision.....
but i was wondering do i have the energy to attend the lesson....
but most probably i got to....
o level is coming fast.....
this month is my O's le......
hm.... very scared.....wondering who can help miie to calm down...
kind of need some support in studies and mentally...
haha i was wondering can i reach my goal....
English: B4

A Math:A1

Science:A1
Chinese:A1
Humanities: most probably A2....

  1. hm.....can i promo to Poly first year....
    it will still remains as a Questin to all and miie until the release of O level Result
    hm... will try my best too.....
    god Bless miie.....
    and lastly,
    im looking forward everyday for miracles to come towards miie.....
    please...miracles my.......
    haha can't say again.....
    wondering hows the life of her????
    i can't ask because NO guts.....
    doesn't want to disturb her.........
    because im afraid things might go worst....
    hm.. maybe we will lost contact for very long like we use to be....
    half a year if im not wrong....
    but in this time,
    maybe 1
    2
    3
    4
    years maybe....
    lets wait for miracles to happen although the chance in succeeding is very low.....
    wonder what can i do.....
    but i think there is nothing i can do now...
    because its too late to regret......
    hm.....thinking of it every single day even when i was studying.....
    hm......lets see ba.....
    船到桥头自然直。。。。
    ya there is something for miie to share that is at the top haha
    as i just get a photo...
    so enjoy laughin ba because......
    its looks funny to miie too....haha
    haha im weird.....
    In Additon,
    and maybe not going to sleep today again le....bye....
    -end-

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Time: 4:48 AM

Sunday, October 4, 2009
waiting is miserable

hey im back with a very terrible feeling in miie
i am really very stress now
its miserable
what can i do?
i can't do anything
in my mind there is alot of 'What If'
'What if here'
'What if there'
What if......
i can't say out
i am very scared now
i don't want to lose it just like that....
im scared
very very scared
can anyone tell miie what is the right choice?
hm....
puzzle are fun
but being puzzled is not fun
as every bit and pieces are matching to form an answer....
its bad...
very very bad
i don't want it to come true....
but it is beyond my control
im feel so heavy now.....
how long do i have to be like this....
i don't want to lose it
because it really mean a lot to me....
i can sense that something bad is coming my way....
im scared
what can make miie to calm down?
what can i do to make myself calm down?
pulling my hair now....
not to make it spike...
but to get an answer from my mind
wanted to pull it out....
hw long do i have to tolerate with this pain and misery.....
really very scared...T.T......
this is the first time in my life i felt so frighten....
miracle or fate?
which one to choose?
i want miracle....
i don't want fate....
i want miracle to make us to be fated.....
because i really..............
cannot say here....
my mind is pulling myself apart now....
im going out of control soon...
please no matter what...
my mind plese stay cool and obedient...
let miie to control you please....
because i don't want to do something stupid.....
i once make a big mistake so i don't want to make that same particular mistake again....
Please endure to success.....
ENDURE!
to miie the mooncake that i eat just now is bitter(ku)
because im all alone celebrating the mooncake festival on my own....
i have no place to go...
because there is no place that can fix miie into it.
im just a extra......
WTF!!!!!!!!!
im going crazy soon......
please KELVIN...
'ENDURE TO SUCCESS'
-end-

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Time: 1:40 AM

Saturday, October 3, 2009
Can't sleep arh...

hey im back..haha again
hm...kind of bored because im still waiting....
but nevermind...
everyone have the time when they are tired....
so i can understand....
hm....in addition there is no reason for you to reply...
because you have a choice....
hm....sad a while only
but after that ok le....
hehe.....
hm... wondering what my future will be sia....
lolx....
hm....thinking a lot again
because i just finish watching the video on
'Fann Wong and Christopher Lee wedding'
haha interesting
they have their way to start their story...
kind of interesting
so must study hard now for my future
really scared that my future will be....
haiz....
really wish to live in a family which are
First: Happy
Second: Not very rich nor poor just 'normal Rich can le'
Able to support a family of 5 to 6 people(including me lah) im ok with it le
Third: United
hm... really have to work for it le...
haha target.....
the earliest for me to get married will be at a age of....
30!
haha but before that i have lots of things to do
have a lot of things to settle first
hm..my O level will be my priority...
second....haha maybe will share next time.....
hm...its a wish that i want it to come true as soon as possible
ya can say its miie 'Yi Xiang Qing Yuan' lah
hm...don't know whether if it is really a bad things, what will be my reaction????
will take times to calm myself down ba
or maybe work Daily....haha 15hr....
wah....
hm... will end here...
maybe i don't know whether should i make a miracle of my own or wait for miracles to come to miie...
temporary will be waiting ba....
later is celebrating of moodcake festival..
hope that someone can jio me go out, although im already going out with my friend lah....
but honestly, i can push it aside anytime
thats seem selfish to my friends.....
hm...just let miie be selfish for this time ba...
Will Be Waiting~
(just to add in, please don't be upset while reading my post. Im Sorry..)
-end-

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Time: 3:55 AM

Basketballer


School:YISHUN SEC(5N1)
Owner:KELVIN
Age:hyper17
Status:EMO Single
First Cry:3rdFeb92
CCA:Playing Basketball
Attitude:LAME and EMO

LOVEs

♥ Love LZ
♥ Spending great time

with friends
♥ Being LAME
♥ Being EMO
♥ Basketball
♥ Seeing people happiie ♥ To have great
memories
♥ Talk crap
♥ Make friends

HATEs
NOTHING AS ITS VERY TIRING TO DO SO AND I MEAN BOTH PEOPLE AND THINGS

CRAVINGs

[Get O level's Certificate At The Year 2010(L1R4 14 points)]

[PSP]

[Formal Shirt]

[More Shirts]

[More 3/4 Pants]

[More Long Pants]

[More Going Out Shoes]

[Laptop]

Everything MORE! More! More! Lolx

{I am GREEDY, so everything i would want more! Lolx}


Footprints

chat chat




MusicPlaylist
MySpace Music Playlist at MixPod.com